wel heres an uprdate
im still drinking woooot
played some scatagories otnight. my mind is some hsarp when im on the booxe!
lol
i won
for the first time eber

so im stilllonely
boohoo
not matter how mny bottoms of the bottle i meat i am still bye myself
lol
i cant believe i just said thsat
hmmmm
i wish i had someone here to go drinking with me.

*i had almost found a face, i was almost me, but my prode couldnt swallow my hate, boy i hope youre happy..
today i found my face.. floating in a puddle of grace*

la la la la la
im boring
im going to go

who caan i find t talk to at 11:14 on a friday niht
hmmmm

i must have some weirdos on my lis t somehwere. hahha
oh ,y
lonely
i am so lonely
i have no body
to call me own

pezzyann was fooled on 11:11 p.m..

so its friday.
friday night, really.
and here i am, watchin friends and drinking by myself. haha
such a loser
*shakes head in shame*
dear lord

so i got my tattoo. *smiles* lord, that was a whim. i cant stop lookin at it though. haha
everytime i pass a mirror i damn near gives myself a stigmatism (spelling?) lol anyways, i hurt my eyes.

LOL

damn my tooth is so sensative! its my filling, really
and ever since it started hurting, all i can think about, for some weird reason, is rubbin tin foil (r the tab of a pop can) over it.
my god, if you havent done that before, try it. its sooo weird.. and it hurts. (dont ask)
but thats all i can picture in my head and it hurts even more. - not to mention, gives me the willies.. *shivers*
eugh

ohhh that snap commercial for povity gives me shivers too.

maybe im cold. maybe i just need a sweater. lol

so i went to the village this evening.. figured id have a look around for a while. but then all the crazies came out. (and only crazies hang at the village..) so i took off for the next bus haha

my fingers and wrists are starting to tingle.
i dont know if its from the booze or my ever worse-ing carpo tunnel.
everytime i get a bad pain and that makes my figers and wrists gimp up all i can think is, man, i made fun of sheldon for this!
lol
karma kickin me square in the butt.

anyways , for a friday night tv sucks.
wish i had someone here drinking with me.
hah

shitty being alone *big sigh*
someone come drink with me!!

i supposed ill be out for a smoke.
hope you all enjoy my entry
hah



*are you gonna let that stain call you a sissy?!?*

pezzyann was fooled on 7:49 p.m..

Its the 26th already.. time is flying by.
I was going to update this last night but got distracted and didnt bother.
Im so tired right now that i have a headach
I bet if i went to sleep right now, I could sleep right up till tomorrow monring.
its to early though. i should as least wait untill 8..

im eating twizzlers for supper. mmmm
im not even that hungry. it just feels nice to chew on em with my ever-so painful growing wisdome teeth!

so i though of a new tattoo im gettin. all i need is the money to get it and the right design. and the money. lol
and someone to come with me!
its in my damn head now too. so i REALLY want it. lol
actually
i had a dream that i had it and i really liked it
so..
who wants to come get tattoos?!??
anyone?

work is a headach. i havent been sleeping well lately. im loving it when i gets 5 hours of sleep a night. 3 people that i usually sit around and quitting this week. im sick with envy. 2 are going away to nothing.. just ei and one is going to ict. neither is really better then convergys, but my lord, anyway AWAY from convergys sounds good to me. lol
hmmmm *ideas ideas*
theyre lookin for workers at the cotton club.
i can serve beer between my boobs, im sure i could get the job
lol
anyways i guess thats all for now.
im working tomorrow, off wednesday
i can NOT WAIT.
then im off sat and sun
going to be so nice..
ohh im going to sleeeeeep all day!

pezzyann was fooled on 6:24 p.m..

okay
i just watched bon jovis new video i dont know the name
but the words are

when the world gets in ym face i say
have a nice day

im like wtf??

haha
when the world gets in my face i say
shut the fuck up and get out of the way
lol

pezzyann was fooled on 5:21 p.m..

So i went to stavanger today. what a long haul! so out of the way with the busses and evrything.i paid future shop though, and went to old navy and found the top ive been lookin for for weeks
AND it was on sale! awsome.. i also got a couple 99 cent shirts there too
ahaha
love the clearence rack.

i went to winners in search of a new purse. i saw a bunch, but decided i have enough for now. so i never got one. (a very proud moment for me. everyone knows how much i love my purses..)
i was also lookin at the shoes, as i am interested in gettin a pair of sorta heals. (i dont want them too high. just a small heal)
anyway i tried on cute pair on but as soon as i took a step i slipped, almost done the splits and cursed rather loudly. needless to say i didnt get them. i dont need to be going tits-up all over this city! haha!

then i went and got groceries.
75$ worth! argh! so expensive!
thats cause i got a lot of fruits/vegies. and lord knows something like that cant be cheap!
so now after all my bills are paid im left with practically nothing.
so much for starting my christmas shopping.
maybe next check.
maybe i can start doing some overtime or something.
wait. haha. like thats ever going to happen.
pffft
I forgot who i was there for a second. lol

anyways, im home now, doing nothing. think ill have some spegattie for supper
mmmm

oh as well, not that it matters, lol, but im working myself slowly off bessies.
got a little bit of an addiction going on. hah
one day at a time, say goodbye oka dokas.

anyways that is all for now. i notcied no one has been updating!
hmmmm
another boycot?? (is that how you spell it?)
i think so..

pezzyann was fooled on 3:32 p.m..

Im off for 2 days! thank jesus!
on the walk home i was thinking how cool it would be if i found an envelop with like 25 grand in it. haha that would be sweet.
oh the things i would do..
id rather win 25 mil in the lottery, but i wouldnt turn down 25 thousand.
haha
25 million though, is plenty to take care of me, everyone i love and quit a few people at work that i like.
ohhhhhhh soooo nice. i can only imgine!

so wait now, theres a bon jovi and john bon jovi? john bon jovi is gonna be on oprah tomorrow. or is bon jovi and john bon jovi that same person?
and if not, who the hell names their child bon? - scary.

im sittin here now, drinking my supper
mmmmm milk
*sip*
well, now im full.
whew!
*rubs the full belly*

hmmm i dont really have much to talk about. nothing exciting has been happening.
i can go for a feed of chinese food though, i tell you!
hmmmm now that i dont have to go to bed early, i think i might take a little nap!
ohhhhhh a nap sounds sooooo good right now!
curl up (unfortunately by myself) cuddle into the blankes and sleep!
mmmm

oh my, i heard on the news today that bottled water actually isnt good for you!
bottled water doesnt have something in it and because of that it can cause you to get cavaties!
can you imagine?
scientists say not to drink bottled water, docs say to drink what, 8 glasses a day? i guess everyone assumes we have a trickling fresh water stream near by where we can get fresh sparkling water. (screw drinking it, id be swimin naked in it!)

anyways thats all for now. hope this tickles your fancy pam hehe

XO

pezzyann was fooled on 5:34 p.m..

Oh my god
i have been sitting here for hours
someone please, come in and rotate me... i think i might be gettin bedsores.
Ive been watching sex and the city ALL day (well, since after work)
and my lord, im an addict. the last eppisode.. lord help me, i sat and bawled!
its pathetic though, cause its like their my friends. haha there was one part where carrie tripped up big and they lay on the floor laughing, and my god, i laughed with them! as if to say carrie, you silly little thing.
i was like, what the hell i that?
and when charlotte got the pic of her baby, i was like, ohmygod, finally charlotte! your baby!
haha
i dont know. hah
Sex and the city has been taking up a lot of my time. which is alright, but i got NOTHING dont today. and there were a couple things i needed to do.
oh well.
that wont be happening.
i just have to say one more thing
lol
samantha finally fell in love! about damn time too! its a wonder she never cought the clap!
and that smith. god hes a cutie. kinda reminds me a little of brad pitt. (the hair and all..)
oh and marianda.. god love her.
im DEF. burning them all off so i can watch them over and over.
its a disease, i tell you.

i had a semi shitty day at work today. was there a LOT longer then my shift cause an old fart that needed to go through reg
by the time i got out of there i was pissed and depressed. skipped the gym completely and went shopping. - because i need more clothes, you know. haha

i heard the funniest thing at work though.
crazzy lady sittin behind me was doing something and lookeddown on the floor and noticed dried up cleanin whipes.. and she was like,
"look at all these dried up alcohol whipes.. someone probably sucked them dry"

if you saw her, youd laugh.
god love her heart. she moves so fast. and she was talking then about gettin caffeen pills. i was thinking hunny, .. dont.
she was there like 3 hours or something and had FOUR BOTTLES of coke gone!

oh just one more thing, i promise!!
and this is more for amanda (i dont know how many other SATC watchers we have...) bigs real name is john? what the hell? throughout the whole series is was weird names, aden, burger, the russian, big.. and then big turns out to be john?
i was dissapointed!

*sigh*
besides that not much is new. hate work, wanna quit. dont know what to do.
checked into the whole mun thing and got NO help from them
i felt like sayin look at me hunnie. i aint gettin any younger here. let me go to school.
all i want to do is go to school and they make it sooo hard. jesus. i was like thats fine. I will just live and die at convergys..
sometimes i think that stickin a pen in my eye and going to the hospital would be a good way to get off work for a few days
or attempting to choke myself (or someone else) will get me dragged off to the looony bin.
were all going to go there eventually. (or were all going to need to at some point)
might as well do it now and get some time off.
*ideas for tomorrow*

come on wednesday and thursday...
tomorrow is okay though
i get to sleep in till 7:15
that makes me happy.. (it doesnt take much these days)


*we carry on our back the burrdon time always reveals
its the bitter taste of losing everything I felt dear..
I have sunk so low
I have messed up better, I should know
so dont come around here and tell me "I told you so"*

pezzyann was fooled on 11:18 p.m..

i was going to update tonight
but mike came on and i get to see him on cam!!
so im watching him..
ill update tomorrow!
sorry to dissapoint my fans. :-)
tomorrow... i promise

pezzyann was fooled on 11:41 p.m..

The tears drip down
my face
you whisper to me
"tell me you love me
tell me ... "

They drip from my eyes
down my nose
landing on my lips where

you give me salty kisses

I miss you already I love you

pezzyann was fooled on 11:49 p.m..

whisper
to
me
sweetly now

and

tell me

I

Will never die

pezzyann was fooled on 11:46 p.m..

hmmmm what to write..
i went to pam and stephs the other night. the bus ride was an experience.. haha i actually dont mind the bus. its alright. and i actually got off at the right stop, so its all good. it was fun too! they were playin guitars and singing and stuff. so much fun. and it was nice to be with just girls.

perry is gone to saint peire (oh lord, thats weird to spell) now. hes left me. mike left me. deb left, mike left.. im all alone! thank god for sheldon and jenn. i would NOT be able to stay in this house alone! i can only imagine!

sat night we went downtown and had a laugh. we got the same russian cab driver that we always get! its weird too! like i basically ran out in the middle of the road and got him. hah and we got in and me and robyn were like, oh my god, do you remember us?!?! hahaah
i think hed do us LOL
what a sin! its be wicked if we got him like every time. robyn got him to say, thats hot in russian. he seems so quiet and stuff lol
oh lord

i had the weekend off and ive been sleeping in till like 1 evey day
its back to work tomorrow. jeeze.. awake by 7
yuck.
im off again friday though, so thats alright. only 4 days or something. and its back to the gym everyday after work. holy.
i better get thin! hah and fast too! lol

anyways i guess thats it for now. i spose ill go and give mike a call. he seems to be doing alright up there. its only his first week anyway. hes gonna need more time to adjust.
i got a big ol saucy package to send him. i dont even wanna imagine what its going to cost! now that i think of it, ive totally gotta pay my phone bill.
damnit.
haha
late again!

les

pezzyann was fooled on 11:38 p.m..

Mike has been gone for 4 days.
its a little better now. Bed time still sucks without him.. and work REALLLLLLY stinks. i mean, i sat and ate lunch at the big ol table by myself and watched the little video i have of him on my phone and i was fighting tears... i have the silliest piture of him asmy wallpaper on my phone. about 20 times today id open my phone and look at it. i dont know, just to make sure it was still there or something. it made me smile.. it made me wanna cry.
a lot of people are quitting and just going on ei. every second person i talk to has their notice in. its making me sooooo jealous

perky is coming in tomorrow and im excited. hes gonna meet me up to work, were gonna walk to dominion and im gonna get groceries... then come home. i dont know what were gonna do all evening though. im not a very good hostest.
maybe well go for a walk down to tim hortins.

*sigh* me and mike walked down there once ... *sigh*

pezzyann was fooled on 11:22 p.m..

So mike has finally left me.
it doesnt even seem real. its like one day we were talking about it and the next day hes gone.
when i was at the airport i couldnt stand to watch him go through security.. i gave him a hug and kiss and ran outside. and i was sittin out there waiting for merlin and darleen to come out and my mind kept thinking, mike will walk out that door, say "come on baby" take my hand and we'll drive home. but my heart knows that mike is on that plane and ready to take him thousands of miles away off to god only knows where...
I was sick for days from nerves. i mean sick.. stomach sick. i had a head ach that lasted for days, i cried so much i think i busted a couple small blood vessels in my freekin eyeball.
i just keep thinking, whos going to rent movies with me, cuddle with me, christ, i tried to make the bed by myself tonight and thought id have a hernia. (sp?) i dont even know how to cook or shop just for one. And work.. oh lord, i dont even want to be in that building without him.
i know thats all pathetic but my lord, ive been with him every day and night for 2 years. We kindve had a routine going.
so anyways
i watched sex and the city all day. and i mean, all day. from 8 this morning to 8:30 tonight. and first it was good. i figured id watch the good ol single beautiful, new york city (which, by the way, is my dream place to live) they all sleep alone, its just the girls for them, most of the time. but as i got further and further into the seasons, carrie, marianda and charlotte all got guys and theyre all kissy kissy cutesie pie cuddle crazy. so that didnt do me any good. fuckin curly haired skinny lucky bitch. i felt even more depressed then when i started.
but i had a productive day.
i started cleaning at 8 (along with my SATS) and just finished.
i cleaned this whole room. i did everything, even organize all the old cds, i got a little hat rack hung up in the closet, got the closet cleaned, got ALL the laundry and bed clothes done.. cleaned and tidied everything. and now im here.

i hear cars coming up the road and they sound like their gettin close and i light up thinking, "oh my studly is home!!"
but no. 4 months. thats a really long time. everyone keeps telling me families do this all the time and a lot of people go away to work.
but mike is my family and we dont do this. i keep expecting him to come into the room and say "wow baby good job cleaning!"
even while im writing this now, it crossed my mind that this is just a dream and none of this is really happening.

its funny, cause i had that really creepy dream about my teeth falling out and the next day mikes tooth basically crumbled away! then i bought my cool new luggage set and the next day we found out mike was going so we were packing his bags...
*sigh*
hes gone.

im watching americas funniest home videos. they had the video clips of kids wackin at pinyottas (spelling?) and everyone stands by close and watches. as if youre not gonna get a wack in the sac or box out of it. sheesh. and they all do the same thing. *shakes head* only americans...

anyway i guess that will be it for now.
ive been awake since 5:30 so i think ill get into bed. ive got brand new fresh sheets put on and new pillow slips. but i can still smell mike a little in his, so i think ill cuddle into his for a while.
i havent changed his pillowslip..
not yet ..

pezzyann was fooled on 8:39 p.m..